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“But you took the pic and told the story. And that is how I know you. Helping women tell their story.” Jennifer
I have been in a crazy mood for a few days now. On Friday, my husband decided to take a vacation day so he was at home. I got some work done and was writing my blog post when my youngest screamed bloody murder. It was a different scream and instantly I just knew something was seriously wrong.
She ran out of her bedroom, holding her eye screaming, “My eye. My eye.” I moved her hand out of the way a little bit and blood was coming out so I grabbed her quickly and ran down two flights of stairs screaming at my husband who had his gaming headphones on. I passed her off to him, totally freaking out, asking what I needed to do. I grabbed my phone and called 911.
I was not calm.
I was not collected.
I was shaking.
I am so lucky that my husband is the one that can manage the calmness in a situation like this.
The EMT arrived and he was so incredible with her. By the time he had arrived, Richard had stopped the bleeding but we weren’t sure if there was damage.
Oh, what happened?
Well, she was putting laundry away in her room like she does all the time. Somehow, two metal hangers got stuck together and one of them came back and hit her in the eye.
We both got to experience an ambulance ride for the first time together. This girl, Iliza, has LOVED and has wanted to be a firefighter and a police officer for as long as I can remember. So as I was carrying her out to the ambulance, she grabbed my face in her little hands, brought my ear closer to her lips and whispered, “This is the best day ever mama!!” And my heart stopped and I couldn’t help but smile at her little face and her eye that was swollen and already bruised.
I haven’t decompressed from this yet. I feel like I have been nonstop since it happened. The tears are coming. I can feel them but they are stuck. Maybe it is because I am just going, all the time. So I know it is only a matter of time when it will sneak up on me and I won’t be able to hold back the tears.
DREAMS, REALITY AND A PURPOSE-DRIVEN BLOG
Izzy reminded me on Friday of the importance of having dreams. This year has been strange. I have been going through some of the hardest emotions that I have faced. The dark moments come and seem to grab ahold of me, not wanting to let go. I close myself up. I don’t confide in people because sometimes when I do, I feel like I am being a burden. I know that I shouldn’t feel that way but I do. My reality has a way of making me feel like my dreams aren’t good enough. Silly, right?
I am lucky to be surrounded by women who have this magical quality of saying exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it. Like Jennifer above, who late last night I began to complain about something I needed to complete. That is when she sent me that message above, talking about my daughter and how I did what I do, help women share their stories.
THE IDEA OF CLOSING MY BUSINESS
Over the past couple of weeks, the thought has crossed my mind more than once.
The doubt.
The fear.
The belief that I am unable to grow.
The belief that I just don't have what it takes.
The belief that I would be better off as an employee.
The belief that my family would be better off with me as an employee.
Over the past couple of weeks, I have cried more than ever before. Usually, all it takes is turning on Grey's Anatomy to turn into a blubbering mess but I know that deep down, it isn't the show that is causing this grief. It is the thought that I am not going to make the impact that I want to in the world.
Just the idea and thoughts of me closing my business and my passion bring tears to my eyes. It is so much of NW that there are days I don't see where my business ends and I begin. Blogging has become a HUGE piece of me. A piece that I couldn't imagine not having.
Why am I talking about all of this?
I want to talk about what kind of blogger I really am. I have tossed out mental health blogger, blogging blogger, self-love blogger. In reality, I am a bit of each and I know that none of these fully encompass what it is that I really do.
MORE THAN ONE BLOGGING NICHE
I am beginning to realize that I don’t fall into ONLY one of those niches. By trying to fit into them, I am losing what I actually do. That is where the idea of purpose-driven blogging or purposeful blogging has come from. I also like to think of it as impact blogging.
Purposeful blogging is about creating content that inspires, connects, serves and informs your readers on a topic. In a previous post, I talk about the passion behind my blog.
This is what I really want to teach women. I want to teach women that you can have a purpose, you can inspire others while teaching them through blogging. By allowing myself to be a purposeful blogger, I am allowing myself to fill all of those niches without having to explain myself or without having to give up a piece.
Blogging for me started because I wanted to share my story. It has led me to where I am now. Wanting to help women share their stories. I want to teach you how to blog purposefully. I want to show you that by combining your passion, your story and your expertise, you already have everything that you need to be a purposeful blogger.
Are you ready to learn how to successfully share your story, create a community around you and make money your way? Join my Blogfluent program to start your blog. If you are wanting to start a blog specific to your trauma experience, join my Blog to Heal program. Both programs start in September.
Let me help you move past the fear of sharing your words.
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