Have you ever had someone tell you that you couldn’t?

I mean, I have more times than I would like to say out loud. 

It isn’t even those who are telling you that you can’t do something. It is also those who tell you that you aren’t good enough (even if they use different wording but mean the same exact thing!) It is those who see you as competition. It is those that do not have your back.

This post is about silencing them. Shutting off those outside influences that break you down little by little until all you do is doubt yourself. That ends today!

HOW OUTSIDE INFLUENCES AFFECT OUR LIVES

Outside chatter can take over and begin to change the voices in your head. Little by little you begin to believe what they are saying more so than what you know and feel in your body. And with that comes changing who you are, looking to outside validation for somebody you don’t even want to be, and giving up on the dreams that you have because someone told you it just isn’t possible. 

Sound like you?

In my life, I have had all sorts of people do this to me.

Friends

Family

The man who sexually assaulted me

They all took away pieces of me even when they didn’t realize that they were doing that. Maybe they thought that they were supporting me. Maybe they thought that their truth should also be my truth. Maybe they did it purposefully because I intimidated them. 

At the end of the day, the reason why doesn’t matter. We need to learn how to silence this noise so that we can live a life that is filled with our own happiness, our own beliefs, and our own dreams. 

So how do we silence those voices? 

We need to begin by recognizing who the negative influences are in our lives. Identifying these negative influences empowers us to shield ourselves from their harmful effects. It isn’t always completely possible to cut those people out of our lives so we will cover strategies to use if that is the case. 

We need to begin by recognizing who the positive influences are in our lives. The more we can surround ourselves with positive influences, the easier it is to drown out what the negative ones are doing. Find yourself a group that will cheer you on and support you. If you need that, I am here for you! 

STRATEGIES TO IMPLEMENT TO SILENCE THE OUTSIDE INFLUENCES

For the month of August and half of September, my hubby and I are doing a wellness challenge. This challenge is giving me the opportunity to focus on different levels of my well-being. Would you be interested in joining us? This could be the start of learning how to listen to what your body needs and to move forward with your life.

For this challenge, we are keeping track daily of specific activities. The activities that we are keeping track of are…

• Daily evening walk
• Stretch 5-10 minutes per day
• Read @ least 10 pages
• Meditation
• No phone 30 minutes before bed
• Pack lunches for work
• Write a daily gratitude list
• 20-minute workout
• Take vitamins

Now on top of these activities, I am also keeping track of…

• Drinking chlorophyll water
• AM walks with Nova
• Morning smoothie with collagen
• Kneeling squats

If you would love to join, you can grab this tracker that is specific to this challenge. Submit it to me on September 16, 2023, and I will pick a winner to receive the new layout for The Mom Brain Planner. 

Now let’s dive into the strategies that you can start implementing today.

Focus on your goals

In order to stop focusing on the outside influences, we need to begin to focus on OUR goals. Whether you have BIG, yearly goals that you are working towards or smaller monthly goals, keep focused on how you can achieve them.

When you are too busy working on your dreams, those around you don’t really matter. 

Practice mindfulness

There is nothing better than taking time to sit in quiet. It will take a bit of getting used to but it is an invaluable skill to learn. 

When you need to figure out where you are going, sit in stillness.

When you need to find yourself, sit in stillness.

When you need to calm your body, sit in stillness. 

When you need to relax and destress, sit in stillness. 

Start small if you are a beginner. Start with five minutes and build from there. Even five minutes is better than nothing. 

I love to use Insight Timer to both time my silent meditations and also to do guided meditations. 

Seek inspiration

Find those who inspire you to be and do better. Whether they are people you follow on social media or they are friends and family members. Surround yourself with them more often. 

Inspiration is what is going to give you the motivation to begin and to keep going. Inspiration is where the spark begins. Go find your spark and inspire yourself to follow that light inside.

Throw away the idea that you need to impress people

This was the biggest lesson that I learned going through my self-love journey. I used to live my life the way that I thought I was supposed to. It used to matter to me how the world portrayed me. I wanted to be that perfect mom, the perfect wife, the perfect woman. 

I needed to do it all, be it all, or otherwise, I just wasn’t worthy of anything. Once I began my healing journey and I began to fall in love with who I was, not caring what others thought was a byproduct of all the work I put in.

The ones that I thought I needed to impress, really didn’t mean anything to me.

The ones that I didn’t need to impress, didn’t care about any of those things. They were just proud to know me.

Focus on your strengths

We are all born with gifts. We may not know what our gifts are or we may not even realize the ones that we do have. Take the time to figure it out. Learn who you are, what you are good at, what you love and enjoy doing, AND DO MORE OF IT! 

Unlearn who you think you are

The way we see ourselves is a way that no one else sees us.

Currently, you think you are someone because you grew up being told you were that. Time to unlearn all of the things that those around you said and begin to uncover who it is that you truly are. 

When you begin to shut these outside influences out, you can begin to see your true reflection. Begin to unlearn all that you thought you were and learn who you truly are! Hiding yourself is exhausting so just stop!

We are conditioned to believe all of the negativity that those around us say about us. Don’t let it take over who you are!

Silencing the noise of outside influences is a powerful journey of self-discovery and personal growth. We can create a life that reflects our authentic selves and embrace individuality to further empower ourselves. Remember that the path to shutting off negative outside influences is unique to each person but with self-awareness, it is possible to live an authentic life.